Get Over Yourself

Bear with me, for I am about to make myself extremely vulnerable to this place we refer to as “the internet”.

As I have mentioned in previous blog posts, I suppressed the entirety of my thoughts and emotions for a long time during my experience with cancer.  It was like treading water with bricks on my shoulders and it was clear that I was drowning.  Instead of asking for help, even though I knew I desperately needed it, I continued to try to swim on my own – simply because I could not get over myself.  I felt embarrassed and ashamed of the fact that I knew that I needed help, and could not fathom the thought of having to accept or rely on someone’s help other than my own.  I thought I could do it all by myself.  My skull was too thick and my pride was too large.

Eventually, I caved.

I actively sought counseling both during my Mom’s treatments and while she was in remission and I am not in the least bit humiliated to admit it because there is absolutely nothing wrong with seeking help from an outsider, therapist, or counselor. Not only am I a better person for it but a stronger person as well.  It takes maturity and demonstrates responsibility for taking care of yourself when you ask for help.  There is a stigma attached to those who seek counseling and I don’t buy into it for a half a second and frankly, neither should you.  Personally, I think it’s a load of BS.

Seeking help led me to the tools I needed to cope with stress, aided in weaning off the worry and reminded me that hey I’m going to be alright, alright, alright.  It brought a tremendous amount of light back into my life and I started to feel like myself again. I began to smile a lot bigger, laugh a lot louder and for those who know me personally know I laugh pretty damn loud.  Cancer is tough but so are you – you don’t have to and absolutely shouldn’t, deal with it on your own.   So, listen to me and listen to me clearly: GET OVER YOURSELF and ask for help.